Inspiring Woman - Nykitia Ledbetter, MS, LPC

True story...Nykitia and I went to college together for 1 year. I know our friend groups did things together, and I know that we saw each other often during that year at McMurry...but, I don't think that I would honestly consider us to have ever developed a true friendship. However, I can honestly say that I have still been inspired by her and have watched her journey over the years. I can't say that I knew her story, nor the things that she has had to go through to get to where she is today, but knowing it now, just solidifies the fact that she truly is an absolute inspiration, and I knew that asking her to be a part of this was definitely the right decision. I can't say thank you enough, especially since I didn't think she would want to do it, since we don't talk much at all...but I am truly thankful that she did!!

I introduce you to the INSPIRATIONAL Nykitia Ledbetter, MS, LPC!!

*Generally speaking, what was your childhood like?

When I think of my childhood, I have mixed emotions. Overall, it was okay definitely more bad than good memories. My mother went to prison when I when I was 10. She was there for 22 years. I am the oldest of two siblings with my mom. (I have a younger half-sister). Don’t recall living with my mom even before she went to prison. I was with my dad or my paternal aunt and grandma. I recall good memories with my daddy until he went to prison at some point as well, but he was in and out throughout my childhood. Being the oldest I took on responsibility of my brothers who are five and ten years younger than I am. I moved with my maternal grandmother and when she would work, we would go to my aunt’s mom’s sister house where she had five kids. They were my closest cousins. We grew up more like siblings. That’s where most of the fun came in due to having cousins my age and my brothers age. The drawback was my aunt had lots of wild parties. Most do not know, but I was molested one night by a random adult that was attending the party. I never told anyone until I got older; and sex was an issue for me, especially in relationships. I have always worked, I stared at 14 as a waitress getting paid under the table. Then at taco bell and a lifeguard around the same, therefore having two jobs. I was always either working or coaching the younger kids’ basketball games. Sports was my outlet especially basketball. I hate track, but for my area I was considered “good,” but hey I have nine state medals to prove it.  Emotionally it was up and down so I was known as the mean person due to my feelings of not having my parents along with having to care for my brothers as if I had them. When I would have good days, it was usually due to some achievement, but I would then get sad because my parents were not there to share the moment, which is why I chose my profession. I didn’t want kids to feel like I did.

                                               

*What have you learned over your lifetime that you’d like to share with the younger generation?

That you only technically fail when you give up.

*What has the journey/process been like for you to get to where you are today?

Long, stressful and challenging but worth it. When I decided I wanted to become a child psychologist I was not aware of the total process. Also, what they actually; did which is more testing than anything. So, I went the therapist route with intention on finishing my doctorate. College was eventful to say the least. I was on another level and proud to say that I finished. I made poor choices while being in an abusive relationship. I would go to class on a few hours of sleep because he may have lost a gamble and would take it out on me physically. I would cover black eyes and go to school as if it was just another day. Once he kidnapped me and held me at gun point because I was going to this model gig I had in Houston. He did not want me to go. That relationship only made it hard for me to trust or deal with the current abandonment issues I already had. To financially make it I sold drugs, while working to gain the experience for my future career, while going to school full time. I participated in track until I had a major car wreck where I punctured a lung and fractured my hip, so track was done for. My poor choices lead to plenty of fights and mugshots. Once I graduated with my bachelors, I went straight into my master’s degree. I got pregnant and when my daughter was due it was the end of the semester and my professor told me that if I didn’t finish my 10-page paper I would not pass the class no exceptions.  On top of that my job would not be giving my maternity leave because I was there only for eight months, so the stress of having a baby, I had a choice to make. So, I started applying for jobs. I got an interview, but it was for the day after I was supposed to go into labor. I will never forget it was on a Friday October 8, 2010 I searched how to go into labor and decided I was having my daughter early so I can make my interview. I drank castor oil and orange juice. Long story short I had my baby that next day, and thank God for nursey, because I typed my paper on the HTC touch screen sprint phone. I made it to my interview and passed my class. The only regret is my daughter was not breathing when she was born and was rushed to ICU; thank God, she is alive and well, but I didn’t get the job. One thing I can say is I never lost sight of my goal.

*What sacrifices have you had to endure to get to where you are today?

In my daughter early ages time with her was far and in between. I am not a sleeper anyway, but sleep is something I didn’t get much of. My grandmother was sick, so I moved back home to take care of her, so that added a lot of responsibility to my plate to make sure her bills were paid as well as mine. I just finished my masters, but because my degree was from University of Phoenix, when it was time to sit for my state exam I was not qualified because Texas would not accept 12 of my credits. So back to school I went, and had to pay out of pocket this time. I was so hurt, mad, and wanted to give up, but I got though it. Then I failed my state exam by ONE POINT...yep one funky ass point, but the second time with flying colors!!! I worked as an intern at a maximum prison, bartended, and then ran an after-hour spot; so, I was up about 16- 20 hours a day most times. The focus was to complete my hours to become fully licensed because pay is not great as an intern.

 *What do you do for a living?

I am a Certified Trauma Care, Licensed Professional Counselor who believes in the holistic approach by treating the body as a whole. I am driven by my commitment to motivate individuals to reach their full potential of self-actualization and mental resilience. I have worked in a variety of inpatient and outpatient treatment settings providing individual, family, and group therapy. My experience includes children, adolescents, adults, and families dealing with life issues such as: trauma, high risk youth, self-esteem, substance abuse and addictions, anger management, behavior modification and mental health challenges including depression, autism, anxiety, bipolar, and schizophrenia. My preferred counseling style is Cognitive Behavioral Therapy but I use an eclectic approach to counseling in order to fit the need of each individual.

 

*What motivates you the most?

My daughter.

*You are a complete BOSS…as a woman, why do you feel like creating this path for yourself
was/is necessary?

Thank you, this path was created starting with my brothers. I didn’t want them to have to feel the same struggles or emotions I did. So, I wanted to make sure they enjoyed their childhood. Then that just lead to wanting more for my family in general; mainly my grandmother for her sacrifices in raising us. It was also a distraction to avoid a lot of the pain I endured, therefore I focused on school and my goals.

  

*What was it like where you grew up?

It was country. Everyone knows everyone small. Graduating class of like 26 people. But loving supportive town, minus the racism here and there. Mostly white populations.

*Describe your most important friendship(s).

I have a hand full of friends in general. Not a word I use loosely. I have two best friends who have been my rock for the last 16 years. I have another friend that was my roommate in college, so 18 years, but I call her my sister. Then my ace that I grew up thinking we were cousins, but she is my sounding board.

  

  

  

 *What did you want to be when you grew up?

Child Psychologist

*Were there any moments you recall as true breakthroughs in any area of your life?

Just each phase of completions with my degrees. Emotionally making it through two major car wrecks; one of which, they wanted to amputate my ankle, abusive relationship, and being a mother.

  

   

  

*Have your dreams and goals changed through your life?

Not really. For the most part my goal was the same, but my mindset in regard to my goals changed because I was thinking small.

*How do you define a “good life” or a “successful life?”

Stability, healthy, and family

*Do you think a person needs to first overcome serious setbacks or challenges to be truly

successful?

Only if those setbacks affect the growth of the success, otherwise not always the case.

*What would you like your children and grandchildren to remember about you?

How resilient I am along with not accepting no or the easy way out.

*Who was the most influential person to you as a child?

I actually do not have anyone in mind, but I still am a die-hard Allen Iverson fan. My parents were examples of what not to do even though I just got lucky and didn’t get caught. 

 

*What is your greatest hope?

That my daughter has the strength to become a great version of herself in this cruel world.

*Anything you would like to say about your “platform” “area of expertise” “business” or anything at all?

I truly love what I do and aim to help and serve the mental health population. We are currently accepting new clients and can check us out at www.mentalresilient.com. Even the strongest can feel lost, unsure, ambivalent, or unhappy at times. Mental Resilient Services helps individuals put reality into perspective.  While providing a safe place of unbiased, nonjudgmental, holistic treatment that is Resilient, Relatable and Real.

Thank you again so much Nykitia for agreeing to be featured! I know that after reading your feature so many people will be inspired by you!! Definitely go check out her website and reach out if you or anyone you know is in need of some help improving their mental health. 

Lots of Love 💙

Rebekah